so not much has been happening lately. I've just been going about my life. I've read a few books since my last journal. All of them were written by Terry Prachett. The Tiffany Aching books and I'm on the second book of the ones about Mort. I read through them way too quickly >.< I finished the last one I read in one night.

so I'm going to a party this weekend with my friend Matt G. he likes me and it sorta makes me feel all like 'damn it! wtf?!' because I used to like him (O///O) he's a really strange guy (and thats why I liked him) and if I wasn't head over heels for Will, I would probably date him. But hey, not much I can do about that. I just like Will way too much. He's my silly, silly tardface. and I'm his xD

I'm still not talking to Josh. It's a long story. Basically, things just got awkward and we're not associating until I'm...umm...better, for lack of a better term >.<

I'm still trying to quit my depression meds. i really don't like needing medicine in order to be happy and myself. I'm back on them for now though. I need to take myself off them slower than I did last time. Last time I turned into a snappy bitch apparently. and I didn't even know it. but now I know it because I realized that Will was totally right about my behavior...and then I cried because I felt bad....and then a few minutes later I was angry....and then I few minutes later I was happy....yeah....mood swings too. I hate happy pills.

I realized the main reason why I have creative block. I've been trying to make ever single thing I draw be some amazing piece of work. it was overwhelming. I didn't want to be a waste of paper and I wanted to be better. I don't need every single thing I create to be some amazing thing though. I need to regain my doodling ability. And my doodles are already intricate enough. Why was I pushing myself?? I don't know. But I've stopped. and I feel sooooo much better whenever I draw now.

I'm done hampster sitting for my sister. she took Speedy back to college with her. Just when I found out how to make the wheel quiet too >.< oh well.....I miss Speedy D: she was soooooo cute!!!! when I get a job, I might invest in a hampster of my own......even though a kitten would be much better. They grow too quick though. and I've already got two fatass cats that I love.


anywhoo, I have some cleaning to do and laundry to gather before Will comes and gets me.